“I turned and froze, held by the light of the Visser beauty. We stared at each other for a moment, but were shocked back to reality by the chaos surrounding us. I never saw her again.”
“Even now, on the eve of Election Day, the campaign battle is undecided. But, inside sources say Generalissimo Puerco's forces have a strong lead, holding 26 of the 31 registered ballot stations.”
“We are pleased to announce that Generalissimo Puerco, alias Jonathan Sunshine, alias Ronald Unreasonable, alias None of the Above, has won the election by a unanimous vote.”
“In a surprise move to show that he too is making sacrifices, his excellency, El Puerco has blown up his presidential palace.”
“This is not a coup. Parliament still makes all the decisions. We're just here to make sure they make the right ones.”
“Welcome to Vissertown.
But don't push your luck.”
“Just because we're supposed to look like Vissers doesn't mean we have to act like them.”
“I'm just getting into character.”
“You know those Visser prisoners we have? I think we've found a place for them.
“What could be a better world? We have food, free time…and total anarchy.”
“Happiness is smashing a friendly lock with an axe.”
“A Fist in the Groin,
A Boot in the Head,
Accidents Happen
But at least we get fed”
“I don't want food. I am nourished by their suffering.”
“Remember, all you folks playing the Game…If you swallow your pride, you can swallow more food.”
“Carrying a gun in town is like painting a bullseye on your back.”
“After all I've done for these people, what do I get? Pig jokes.”
“My friends, I foresee the dawn of a new age. I foresee a time when Vissertown will stand united, and be a shining example for the rest of the world. And, I foresee only the greatest of prosperity in the years ahead.”
“I foresee you needing some more bodyguards. Soon.”
“Every time Puerco enters a champion in the Game, he puts on a few more pounds.”
“I don't care what this all means. They just wanted a killer, and I'm the best.”
“Coffee, Tea, or X7MP?”
“Well, I'd say either the latest fashion in hats is legs, or that's the Monitor on Osgood's head.”
“If you don't like my snoring, you can go sleep with all the ghosts in the cyst. Sweet dreams.”
“The Normals out on their farms are about as interesting as the food they grow.”
“Not only would I give my life for the Capo, I'd give yours, too.”
“No, Osgood, we can't just starve it out. It's a Spectral, you Visserbrain.”
“Yeah, well, the Monitor slipped by, but we sure taught them Urchins a lesson.”
“President-For-Life El Puerco has given his personal assurance that this will be a Kindler and Gentler war.”
“Seeing how your bat is metal and mine is wood, why don't you just go ahead and take the last apple. No, really, it's no problem.”